Years back, when I was an angry young man, I read an interview with Phil Collins. Phil Collins might seem like an inappropriate music interest for an angry young man, and that’s right, but I was also a bored young man; it seems the two often go together.
Anyway, Collins said something remarkable, along the lines of, “Most people I only meet once in my life. I start on the assumption that they’re not arseholes.” That swept me off my feet. What a completely counterintuitive approach to human relations! It got me thinking, and should I ever write an autobiography, I’m afraid there’ll have to be a chapter entitled, “My adult life began when I read an interview with Phil Collins,” which is not the kind of thing blockbusters are made of.
Anyway, here’s a variant of the Collins Maxim: If someone criticizes you based on what appears to be a misunderstanding of what you meant, consider the possibility that theirs is a reasonable interpretation of what you actually said. Otherwise, it could be you who comes across like an arsehole.
Brownstudy's Blog 